Is Your Soul Starving For Joy?

 In Self Pleasure, Self Worth

Since the day I decided to fall in love with myself and stop trying to live a life that wasn’t mine, I have been one of the happiest people I know – not happy all the time, but happy most of the time, or not very unhappy for very long.

But several weeks ago I found myself on the tail end of a several week “I am not feeling so happy” spin. I’d wake up unhappy, be cranky, feel stressed most of the day, eat way too many brownies, work A LOT, stay up too late, pass out and start the whole thing over again.

Finally one day when my assistant Mary walked in for a fresh day of work and her first tentative words were, “How are you feeling today Christine???” I knew something was amiss and I had to fix it. This wonderful being who helps and supports me was having to stick a dipstick into my temperament just to gauge how close she should get  – now that wasn’t any way to live! And if she was feeling that way, how was my partner, friends feeling? Or even more importantly, how was I feeling??? And had I even stopped to take that into consideration before plunging myself into overwhelm and overwork?

I decided to hold an honesty hearing with myself, a deep conversation that included 5 super powerful questions that led me to the startling truth that my SOUL was starving for JOY

– all the success, $$, drive and hard work were not feeding my soul, because as it turns out my heart derives joy from play, rest AND doing great work – and the first two were sorely missing!

And that is when I realized, I hadn’t asked myself in a very long time ‘What makes you happy?” I hadn’t considered my joy factor when making decisions. And I wasn’t quite sure I could name 10 things that even made me happy, really happy Can you? And are you living them – making sure YOUR soul gets what it needs?

Just like your lungs need air to live, your  SOUL needs MORE JOY … The question is, are you willing to do WHATEVER it takes to create it for yourself. If you don’t, who will?

This meditation and the self love adventure that follows will take you on the same adventure I took that led me back to joy – as I remembered what really made me happy and promised myself to get it!


Supplies: Piece of paper and color-infused writing utensils – Get ready to claim your bliss!

Step 1: Get the Joy Started.

In the middle of the paper write the word JOY. Underneath the word JOY write, “What brings me joy?”

Step 2: Tap into Your Joy.

To get your joy motor moving (it may have been sitting quite awhile) close your eyes, put your hand on your heart and take a few deep breaths with yourself. As you take each breath feel yourself going back in time to different points in your life when you can remember experiencing great joy, bliss, and happiness. Almost as if a movie is playing in your head, see yourself in these moments, feel yourself in these moments and remember what joy felt like for you. If you need help accessing your joy center, go to and get the Self Pleasure meditation.


Step 3: Fill Up with Joy.

Taking what you’ve seen about your joy moments, and what your soul already knows about following your bliss, your mission is to fill your entire page – your personal Joy Portrait –with everything that brings you Joy – words, phrases, and symbols. Make this page Joy-FULL. Use the following joy starters to find your bliss…

  • I am happiest when…
  • I feel most alive when…
  • I feel most free when…
  • I can’t help but smile and laugh when I …
  • When I was a little girl I loved to….
  • My soul gets nourished when…
  • I feel most cared for when…
  • I just love…
  • I find great joy in…

Step 4:  Ask Your Soul What it Needs… and make sure it receives it.

Once the page is full, completely full, pause for a ME MOMENT.

  • What do I see?
  • How is my life in alignment with my joy? How is it not?
  • What’s one re-direct I can make now to attune my life to joy and get my soul what it needs to thrive?

As a completion ritual, write the words “I Attune to Joy” on your ME ART and make a self-love promise to attune your life and timing to what brings you joy.

And I’d love to hear 5 JOY-FULL things you found from this self-love adventure – post them here!



For more self-love adventures, get the free Self-Love Kit
full of all kinds of daring acts of love and inspiration guaranteed to bring
more joy and love into your life!




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Showing 4 comments
  • nicole bell

    people who are truly filled with gods presence bring me joy, exercise, singing, ohs cereal, when i feel grounded and empowered brings me joy, helping people.

    • carylo17

      amen to that nicole!

  • Toni McClendon

    Watching children playing brings me joy! Walking the labyrinth by the river brings me joy! My new year’s resolution for 2013 have more joy in my life? I am an InterPlay leader and deep playing brings me Joy!

  • Lisa

    Great post. It’s a great reminder. I have the joy on my door and wall at home.

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