Choose Self Love: Stop Tolerating What Doesn’t Support You

 In Self Awareness & Honesty, Self Empowerment, Self Trust

Today I am writing you from the road as Noah and I make the trek to Northern California where we will spend the summer with good friends, writing, creating and playing. And I am feeling so full of gratitude for having a relationship and a lifestyle that really aligns to the truth of my heart and soul.

And it hasn’t always been that way.

There was the verbally abusive relationship I tolerated for 14 years, because I was afraid to lose love.

The house I hung onto for at least three years too long because of the security I thought it gave me.

And in the past few weeks, I’ve talked to SO many people who have dreams for their lives… but that are TOLERATING situations, beliefs, and relationships that keep them from what they really want. And that is not self love.

My question to you is…

What are you tolerating?

We tolerate people and situations for way past their expiration date because we falsely believe that’s how it has to be…

or because we are afraid…

or because we haven’t surrendered control to a bigger power.

And so my other question for you this week is…

Are you willing to stop tolerating circumstances that don’t serve and support your heart and soul, and start empowering yourself to be the king or queen of your life? Are you willing to take a stand for self love.

If yes, then take the three step transformation process in the video and then boldly claim what you are not tolerating any longer here…


Lean in to your self-honesty branch of self love and answer these questions…

Step 1. What am I tolerating?

Step 2. What is tolerating this costing me?

Step 3. What is the truth?

Step 4. What is ONE small but mighty action I can take to step forward into the truth?

Then write here, so we can witness and super power your stand…

I will NO LONGER TOLERATE… (insert what you are tolerating)
I CHOOSE… (insert your mighty action)

So for example…
I will NO LONGER TOLERATE having friends who don’t really support me. I choose to receive support from people who can support me instead of wishing others would or could.


join the love club with christine arylo

If you want to nourish yourself on the inside by strengthening your self love,
learn more about the Self Love Foundations class and group called The Love Club.



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Showing 29 comments
  • Barbara

    I will no longer tolerating verbal abuse from my oldest daughter. I am in control. I have broken the chains that were binding me. I decide for myself what is best for me. My life is mine and mine alone no matter my age or situation. I create my surroundings as I wish them to be. I am a creative soul who is finding her spirit once more at age 80.

  • Manda

    I am tolerating and rationalizing my unhealthy weight.
    My tolerating is costing me my health and my energy.
    The truth is that I eat emotionally. I am trying to comfort myself. I can comfort myself in loving ways instead of with food.
    I will think twice about the food I eat. I will ask myself, “Is this going to nourish my body and my dreams?”

  • liz

    Thank you Christine – always timely and heartfelt. My action this week is to explore new training opportunities for better work and income.

  • Alicia

    Thank You this is the first video I watched….and it’s like your talking to me. Awesome….really

  • onica

    IM not going to tolerate liars in my life.

  • Sharon

    I am no longer going to believe the 3 ring circus in my mind…that tells me YOU CAN’T __________.

  • Simmone

    This came EXACTLY when I needed it. Thank you.

  • Christie

    I’m going to pay off all of my debt and get rid of “stuff” that is cluttering my space.

  • Anonymous

    I will NO LONGER TOLERATE comments about my diet and weight, especially since I eat fairly healthy, work out 5 times per week, and am well within the normal body fat range. I will encourage and love myself, even when my husband trys to put me down. I CHOOSE to tell my husband that my weight is healthy, that I love my body as it is, and that I will not hold myself to a standard that isn’t true to my heart and soul. I also CHOOSE to seek food that is nourishing and fulfilling instead of feeling overwhelmed by my anxiety.



  • Tree

    I will no longer tolerate friends who project their own fears and insecurities onto me. I Choose to move forward from them and to speak my truth when it is needed.

  • Mim

    I have been tolerating a relationship that is less than what I deserve. It is costingy my self respect. The truth Is I deserve LOTS better. One action I will take this week is to stand up for myself, no matter the consequences!

  • Kate

    I will NO LONGER TOLERATE my addiction to caffeine – a tool that I am using to numb uncomfortable feelings. I CHOOSE to feel free and powerful and real.

    Thank you Christine very much!!!

  • Yvette

    1. I am tolerating conducting myself (and my life) as something other than myself, forcing forward.
    2. I am so unsatisfied, doing things are so much harder than it needs to be (either because I’m doing something that doesn’t really matter/resonate with me or I feel forced into doing things) It isn’t supportive.
    3. When I am myself, I blossom. When I Love myself, I TRHIVE.
    4. Notice when I am in that shitty forceful mindset, read a chapter from madly in love with me and write myself a love letter.

  • Karen Harris

    I will no longer tolerate NOT living the life of my dreams; I choose to connect to the friends who support me and
    want to also live the life of their dreams.

  • Debbie

    Ok, here goes –
    I will no longer tolerate holding myself back, self abuse that keeps me small in order to feel protected, thinking Im not good enough, not moving forwards to what Im good at, thinking its all too hard, not sorting out my stuff, not being true to myself…
    I choose to step into my own power, stop abusing myself, say affirmations about my own abilities, believe in my ability, sort out my house, be true to me, treat myself with Love. Thankyou

  • Rz

    I will no longer tolerate my procrastination because it’s keeping me from progressing to my next step in life. I choose to face my fears and do what I must do to support the blossoming of my own self.

  • Bridget

    I have released a 7 year relationship and am leaning into the sadness, fear, and truth.As scary as it is, it feels good to live in truth and cultivate forgiveness for myself and him.Thanks Christine for all you give to the universe.

    • carylo17

      Bridget – hugging you for your choice to CHOOSE ME before WE so that you can HAVE THE LOVE you want – most of all from yourself. witnessing your courage and self love xoxo

  • Lizzy B

    I am marketing my healing business to places where I know I can find paying clients! I’m not believing the lie that there aren’t people who can pay for my sessions. I am open to receive abundant income for my gifts that help others receive more love!

    • carylo17

      Lizzy- YES! knowing your gifts are needed and that you indeed can and will receive abundance for those gifts -open your heart to receive your worth.

  • Heidi

    I will not longer tolerate letting other people’s feels and expectations rule m life. I choose to put myself first no matter what anyone else thinks.

    • carylo17

      Ho to that Heidi!!! Way to stand for YOU!

  • Aime

    Gosh I love all these. Mostly connect with what Debbie says because I got out of my abusive relationship and now it’s just me and it’s time for me to see me without the judgement and negative words and low self- worth or self-esteem. And I also connect with “AZ”- procrastination!!! That’s a biggy for me and I do not want to use that to describe me any more! That’s my old story or old stuff! I was in a very dysfunctional relationship and I am free now to be me. Still figuring out who I am. Not sure if that is possible because we are ever changing. Instead of reaching to be different I look at myself in the moment.

    • carylo17

      Aime – first big love hugs to you for being willing and able to leave an abusive relationship! Second, YES! we get to become more and more aware of who we are everyday, like a beautiful flower revealing itself to us. xoxo

  • nadette

    i will no longer tolerate people making fun of my disability or expecting me to ‘explain’ that to ‘understand’ who or what i am…my body is not a joke or a caricature, and it is not something that ‘must’ be explained to know who or ‘what’ i am. i am tired of the programming that i owe anybody these “responsibilities”; it’s an imposition on my time and energy and an attempt to make me self-conscious and not free to just live my life like anybody else (who is not ‘required’ to do that). “nothing to declare” comes to mind~why must i doubt who i already am and lived as/keep ‘defining’ myself?

    • carylo17

      Nadette – witness and LOVE your stand for you!! xoxo Christine

  • Christine

    I chose to nolonger stay in a comfortable, secure relationship (Emotionally, Financially, Socially, etc) because I’m not really “In Love” so I choose to believe that true love not only exist, but that it exist for me and that I’m worthy of it!

    • Christine Arylo

      Christine – witnessed! yes, love is here from you and you are worthy!

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